Wednesday, May 13, 2009

My Ella...

As many of you know I have a special spot in my heart for Owen and Ella, they are my loves and sometimes I think people would assume they are mine due to the unconditional love that I have for these two little children. I love that Jess and Scott allowed me to come into their family and make myself comfortable. I know that I can turn to either one of them when ever I need them! They allow me to take their children for hours at a time, not really knowing what we are doing, and trusting me 100% that I wouldn't put them in harm, which I would never ever do!!

Well, again, as many of you know I got so very sad news about my Owen. At his one year check up his doctor found a very distinct heart murmur and highly suggested they go see a pediatric cardiologist, the sooner the better. Well, Jess and Scott followed the doctors suggestions and saw the cardiologist, unfortunately it was not the best news you could ask for. They found out Owen has a very large hole in his heart (why the doctor heard the murmur in the fist place). It is located in between the two areas (sorry for not being very technical)and it is mixing his "good" blood with his "bad" blood. The happy part is that he will not have surgery until he is at least 3 years old, the doctors told Jess and Scott that if they choose to not address this problem he would live a very happy and full life until he is in his early 30's (give or take a few years) and then he could just drop dead due to the hole. After hearing all this they talked to each other, friend and family but never really addressed it to their 3 year old daughter, Ella. How do you tell a 3 year old your brother is sick, but you can't really tell, and he is going to have to have surgery to fix this by the time he is your age? They just didn't think it was something she needed to know right now (please understand Ella is a VERY literal child).

Well, our Children's Ministry Director let Ella borrow a bible from her office and Ella is all into reading this. Lately she has said many things about God being with her and helping her out. For example: Last night she slipped in the bath tub but caught herself, she was not hurt and didn't really even flinch. I asked if she was alright and she told me "I'm fine because God saved me". Well, Jess, Scott and I were talking last night after they got home and they were telling me the fun things that Owen and Ella have been doing and some storied to go along with them. This one story Jess told me is what inspired me to write this today:

Jess said Ella and her were laying down, reading books and just talking about the day and Ella looked up and asked if Owen had a whole in his heart. Now, remember that they have been talking about his condition since they found out but never to Ella. Jess told her yes and that they would get it fixed when he was a little older. Ella then asked if God put the whole in Owen's heart... they are not ones to lie to their children... Jess told her yes and Ella then asks "If God put the hole in Owen's heart then why are we going to fix it"... I'm sure they came up with a reason Ella could understand but after Jess told me this it got me thinking.

If God puts things into our lives the way he wants them then why do we think it is alright to change or fix them. If he didn't want them right where they were, then do you think he would have put them there to being with? I love how that little girl can get me thinking about some the deepest thoughts with the simplest questions... I love her so much and I can't wait to see her again next week!!

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